The Apparent Crew



This is a page dedicated to fimiliarate those who aren't familiar with the people mentioned on this site, 'cause they mostly are indeed real people. Not that this piece of shit gets any traffic or anything, and when it occasionaly does its me showing a friend at their house or something. I got this idea from reading Evvies crew page.

First thing's first. Me.

Irish by the day, nocturnally pirate, and always drunk. That is the main reason there are billions of mistakes in everything I write.

There isn't really much to know about me, other than the fact that if I don't know you I hate you. I believe that this world is going down hill when I look around and realize how fucking stupid everyone is who holds its future. Who knows, maybe one day I'll be the manager of a liqour store, cause I know that most of the people I deal with can't handle that burdon. I'm sure me and my pal Jimmy could.

Type of ish: Irish
Favourite drink: Beer
Ability to drink: 9/10
As cool as: A pornstar
Has actually been to this site: No
Relation: Me
Age: 18

The next would be Adam Cambell, who occasionaly/never contributes to this piece of shit. Do I have anything to say about Adam? He is the biggest fucking pot head I know, and I remember a time when I doubt it would have been possible to make him smoke weed. Here is a picture of adam deciding it would be good to be ripped, and being ripped! Although he hasn't written much, it is definately hate induced hilariousness. Whos that wicked guy with a Rush shirt on? Is that a keg? Indeed, and yes, it is me!

Type of ish: Gayish
Favourite drink: Scrambled weed
Ability to drink: 6/10
As cool as: 16mm roll of film
Has actually been to this site: I think
Relation: Co starter!
Age: 18

Some people may be wondering who Marko Morello is. He isn't real, but he is a fucking facist ass fuck who thinks hes going to be the prime fucking minister one day. Fucking kangaroos.

One person who wrote I think a total of 2 shitty fucking dumb articles is my mongoloid brother Ben. I put them on because I felt sorry for him. Just look! He tells me he is going to kill himself at least 2 times a day, he smashes video game controllers, slams cupboards in spontanious fits of rage due to lack of food, and drinks lots of beer.

Type of ish: Fatish
Favourite drink: Beer
Ability to drink: 8.5/10
As cool as: John Bonham
Has actually been to this site: Yeah man
Relation: Brother
Age: 20

Tolijano is our next guest of the site, featured in the Badass article. Tolijano is crazy. He is serbian and his dad's name is Darko, which is simply fucked. We never had a picture of toli in the article. We do now though. He is drinking peach schnapps. At school. What a fucking badass! Toli's been around for ages!


Type of ish: Serbish
Favourite drink: Peach schnapps, haha
Ability to drink: recently boosted his way up to a 4.5/10
As cool as: The time I cashed out the Miami Dolphins
Has actually been to this site: Yes
Relation: Pal
Age: 18

Although she was never directly mentioned in many articles up until the Badass competition, she was in many. Charlie, I mean Thao, actually won the badass comp. Only because if she didn't she would have had my balls for dinner. Thao can be seen in the picture above featuring Adam. She can also be seen below, acting like a retard. I know she is going to be furious about this, but hey, you win some, you lose some, or if you're like me, you lose them all, so suck it up!

Type of ish: Meanish
Favourite drink: Who knows?
Ability to drink: 5.8/10
As cool as: The Viet Cong defeating the US
Has actually been to this site: Once or twice
Relation: Girlfriend
Age: How the fuck would I know?

Good ol' Lisa. Mentioned quite often on the site. She was the first of our group to turn nineteen, and the last to get drunk for her first time! I think this movie should sum things up about lisa. ~*PrOm NiGhT*~ (you will need divx codec to view)

Click here to see Lisa Drunk!! Off half a beer!! For her first time!!

What happened was she was really drunk, and I was pooring more booze into her cup when she wasn't looking, (she was sitting down holding the cup over her lap) and when she turned and saw she moved the cup cause the beer to go all ever her legs. It was great.

I think we are all familiar with whom Lisa is... she's the one that giant guy appears to be poking. She looks pretty upset.

Type of ish: Tinyish Chineseish
Favourite drink: Water
Ability to drink: 1.3/10
As cool as: Jackie Chan
Has actually been to this site: No
Relation: Pal
Age: 19

Jimmy Stewart, the famous actor; in fact still alive! Biggest alcoholic, besides me. I think he was first in the article about being ditched, which makes no sense. Here he is, walking into my backyard to help us drink, yet another keg of Blue.

Type of ish: Scotish
Favourite drink: Irish whisky hehe
Ability to drink: 9.8/10
As koo as: Eddie... on weed!
Has actually been to this site: Yes
Relation: Drinkin Pal
Age: 18


Sean. His real name is Guido, we call him tons-a-not-fun. His mom calls him Sean for some fucked up reason. I don't know where she got that from. All I know is she is pretty foxy and Jimmy wants to bang her. Sean once tried to write an article for the site, but it was so shitty I had to wipe my ass with it. Just for the record, I wipe my own ass with all my articles too. I don't think they are funny either.

Type of ish: Italian Danish
Favourite drink: Cum
Ability to drink: 0/10
As cool as: An empy beer bottle
Has actually been to this site: Yes
Relation: Drinkin Pal
Age: 18

Alas, Evvie. Never on the site, until now. I don't want to make fun of him because he lets me put my site on his domain, which is pretty cool! But I now face the need to reveal his true identity, an irish bastard like the rest of us! (Cept fer Thao.) At least I think hes irish, he looks pretty irish. Whatever the fuck he is it ends in "ish."

Type of ish: I Honestly have no idea
Favourite drink: Lets go with vodka!
Ability to drink: I'm assuming 8/10
As cool as: A long hard dick
Has actually been to this site: Oh yeah!
Relation: PAl
Age: 18?













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